This is one of the funniest articles I've read in a long time.  I originally posted it on That's Phucked, under the Worst Date Ever
The article was posted on forum.BodyBuilding.com from a guy named "Malodrax" about his worst date, ever!
This is long, but well worth the read, it's Phucken funny!

Alright...I don't care if you guys believe me ... it's real. This is the the most embarrassing thing that I've ever experienced... it was a horrible night for me.. and I'm sharing it with you guys because I don't want any of my misc brahs to have to go through this.. especially since it all could have been EASILY prevented. I have added MS paint images so that you have a better idea as to what happened. I.... read more.

So far so good.  There have been very few problems experienced by users, let me know if you guys see any problems. Lots of new pictures and videos uploaded, keeping our desire for lots of phucked up satisfied. Here is one of my favorite pics so far...





Love this job!

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.  A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.  Then Andy explained the Colonoscopyprocedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.  I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, quote, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR ASS!'

I left Andy' s office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven.  I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America's enemies.

I spent the next several days .... read more.

A King had to leave his Kingdom for some business. He was afraid that his only Daughter would be taken advantage of by some of the Guards because she was a very deep sleeper. So before he left, he slipped a razor blade between the lips of her vagina. The King left. That night, three of the Guards did plan to Fuck the Princess. The First Guard went into her room. From outside of the room, the other two Guards listened. Suddenly, they heard the First Guard scream. He came out. The other two Guards asked why he screamed. Embarrassed, he said that it was so good that he couldn't control himself. This made the other two smile. The Second Guard went in. After some time? Ahhhhh!!! The Second Guard came out. The Third Guard asked what happened. Just as embarrassed as the First Guard, the Second Guard said that it felt so good that he couldn't control himself. The Third Guard smiled. The Third Guard went into the room. He went up to the Princess and lifted her dress. Outside.... read more.

3 men walk into a bar. After they drink a couple of beers they are ready to leave, but the bartender won't let them unless they have 12 inches of dick between them. The first guy whips his out and shows 6 inches. The second guy drops his pants and shows 5 inches. Finally, the third guy shows his 1 inch dick. The bartender says "Ok, thats 12 inches you can go". As the're walking away the first guy sais to the third, "Thank god you had a boner or we'd still be there."

A Christmas Poem 'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook. Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude. Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my boner and poor momma went dry. Up to the window I sprang like an elf, Tore back the shade while she played with herself. The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built, Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt. When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer. With a fat little driver, half out of his sled, A sock in his ear, and a bra on his head. Sure as I'm speaking, he was as high as a kite. And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right. Whoa Shithead, whoa Asshole, whoa Stupid, whoa Putz, Either slow down .... read more.