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A Christmas Poem
'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude. Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my boner and poor momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf, Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built, Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of his sled, A sock in his ear, and a bra on his head.
Sure as I'm speaking, he was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Shithead, whoa Asshole, whoa Stupid, whoa Putz, Either slow down .... read more. |
Posted on May, 2010 by YungLegend13.Tags: CANNIBAL,HOLOCAUST,death,movie,animal,animals,tribe,amazon,documentary,exploitation 
Cannibal Holocaust really is one of the most controversial films ever made. It has a long history of being banned just about everywhere, and the director was arrested in Italy and charged with making a snuff film – that’s how realistic some of the deaths and dead bodies are in Cannibal Holocaust, the local magistrate couldn’t believe the scenes weren’t real. Cannibal is one of the best examples of Italian horror/exploitation, and while you might think certain cultures are a little strange (Japan!) Italy certainly has some weird stuff going on to have produced some of the films they produced in the 70’s and 80’s. While the director obviously didn’t really kill any of his actors or actresses there are several genuine acts of animal cruelty in the film, including the very real killing of a large sea turtle. This has caused Cannibal Holocaust to be banned in several countries even to this date.
.... read more. |
Posted on May, 2010 by YungLegend13.Tags: Game,Call,of,Cthulhu,dark,corners,of,the,earth,scary The game I am mentioning is called "Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corners of the Earth". This game is from 2006 and is from the survival horror genre. Below is a review by IGN. Their rating is 7.8 but this game is very good.
April 26, 2006 - As an impressionable teenager, I greedily devoured the stories of H.P. Lovecraft. There was something about the indifferent, otherworldly nature of his horrors that really made his stories appealing. Sure, he had his tales of human depravity but, compared to the monsters of Steven King and Clive Barker, the really terrifying thing about Lovecraft's evil monsters was that they didn't take pleasure in human suffering; they were completely unconcerned with how their actions (or in some cases, their very presence) might wreak havoc on the minds and bodies of regular people.
While it makes great material for short stories, that kind of approach just doesn't work as well in movies or video games. I mean, honestly, which sounds like the more marketable,.... read more. |
3 men walk into a bar.
After they drink a couple of beers they are ready to leave, but the bartender won't let them unless they have 12 inches of dick between them.
The first guy whips his out and shows 6 inches.
The second guy drops his pants and shows 5 inches.
Finally, the third guy shows his 1 inch dick.
The bartender says "Ok, thats 12 inches you can go".
As the're walking away the first guy sais to the third, "Thank god you had a boner or we'd still be there." |
A King had to leave his Kingdom for some business. He was afraid that his only Daughter would be taken advantage of by some of the Guards because she was a very deep sleeper. So before he left, he slipped a razor blade between the lips of her vagina.
The King left. That night, three of the Guards did plan to Fuck the Princess.
The First Guard went into her room. From outside of the room, the other two Guards listened. Suddenly, they heard the First Guard scream. He came out. The other two Guards asked why he screamed. Embarrassed, he said that it was so good that he couldn't control himself. This made the other two smile.
The Second Guard went in. After some time? Ahhhhh!!! The Second Guard came out. The Third Guard asked what happened. Just as embarrassed as the First Guard, the Second Guard said that it felt so good that he couldn't control himself. The Third Guard smiled.
The Third Guard went into the room. He went up to the Princess and lifted her dress. Outside.... read more. |